Wave of Light

October 15th is the Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. A day of remembrance for pregnancy loss and infant death, which includes, but is not limited to, miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, and the death of a newborn.

A day where at 7:00 pm on all time zones, a candle is lit in remembrance of all the babies that didn't get to stay with mommy and daddy.

On this day we remember the moments we did have with them (maybe an ultrasound picture, or holding your sleeping baby in your arms, or your baby's smile, maybe just those 2 pink lines). Whatever you did have of them, is part of you and who you are today. We also grieve what we were robbed of. Truth is, we grieve because we love(d) and grief is love with nowhere to go. I loved her when I found out I was pregnant. I loved seeing her on the ultrasounds. I loved feeling her move inside of me. I loved holding her in my arms, even though I knew I couldn't take her home. I will always love her with my life. She changed me. I am a better person because of her, and even though I strongly believe that there really isn't a purpose for her death (because what is more worth than losing a child?) I have found meaning in my loss.